about a week ago i had my most intense DMT experience to date. i dropped a 2cb in the afternoon and after a rather magical cavort in the local park with a similarly twisted friend retreated back home for some 5- meo- DMT. i had been completely free of any other drugs or alchohol for days before hand and had been doing yoga, so the 2cb found me relaxed and tuned in with my surroundings. i had also eaten very little over the course of the day. i knew that 2cb acts as an enhancer, so the fact i'd taken it would invariably enhance the effects of the DMT. my friend and I sat down on my bed and prepared the dosage. it was his first time doing a proper DMT trip so I found myself, despite being similarly inexperienced,(it was my first time with 5meo) taking a guiding role. i gave him his hit first and as he sank into a trance began to prepare my own. as i lit the pipe and began to inhale he opened his eyes and looked directly at me with a look of despair....."its all gone wrong.." he uttered, shaking his head. "oh no.." i thought as the dmt started to warp my brain. without warning he sprang to his feet, shouting "i've got to go to work tommorow! i can't be doing this!" i tried to calm him, cradling his body in my arms and rubbing his head until he subsided, and then slowly began to giggle, becoming more and more manic until he was rolling around shreeking with joy and thanking me over and over again. by this point i was on such a low dark vibe myself i retreated foetus like under my covers, with the back of my brain feeling tense and painful. i heard him leave the room, and lay there for a while, did some deep breathing to ground myself and called him back in. he recounted his experience "...a tunnel..a pulple darkness, negative feelings, immersion followed by emregence..renewal, hilarity." i felt cheated of my own experience, as it had felt as if I had just been caught up in the end of his, which, as dmt is about as personal a trip you can hope for, left me feeling empty and vaguely depressed. however, i had in my possesion a third hit. being pretty into chasing synchronicities i deduced that the only reason i had three was beacaue the other one fell flat and i was being offered a second chance. i decied, albeit tentatively, that i had no choice other that to do it. still tripping of the 2cb, in the fading remnants of the last hit and metaphorically shitting myself i inhaled. and... dissolved. .............................nothingness.............an absense of everything..no body no matter just void. unspiritual, unphysical unfeeling unanything. utter perfection, pure khaos. "ohshitohshitohshit i've took to much gone to far i'm dead!!!!!!" i managed to open my eyes, the most terrifed i'd ever been, shaking, my heart beating at obscene rate, pounding in ears. i stared breathing manically, seeming unable to catch my breath, convinced i was having a heart attack. "phone an ambulance!" i gasped. my friend came rushing in, and made me take long breaths, amazed at the speed of my heart rate. gradually it slowed down, and he held me for a while while i lay exauhsted on the bed. "i'm not dead, i'm not dead I'M NOT DEAD!!!!!!!HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!" i tried to cry but couldn't, and had to make do with wailing and howling, which kind of worked. after a while i subsided and lay there with a grin the size of brighton tearing my face open. my excursion into the void has left me feeling happy and humble. my fascination with khaos and the occult has left the mantra 'be careful what you wish for", ringing in my ears; i found the void i had thought of so much, without any magickal/meditatative procedure and it scared the living shit out of me. i've heard 5meo-dmt has no personality, and experiences of this kind are quite common, can anyone enlighten me? and has anyone else tried combining 2cb with 5meo?
safe as fuck psychonauts xxx